This post may be too much for some of you. It's almost too much for me. But it's NaBloPoMo so I'm posting stuff that would otherwise not make the cut. You're welcome, in advance.
ALSO.
I usually try to save major (ahem) bathroom trips for home, but this morning at work I just couldn't wait. So I gave in and went to the ladies' bathroom. There are two stalls in there. It's nice that there's more than one so you don't have to just stand there awkwardly and wait (ooh, foreshadowing), but on the other hand, two stalls doesn't allow for a lot of anonymity. There's you, and there's them. This morning, I was lucky (or so I thought) to be the only one in there at the time I entered.
Anyway, right after I went in and, uh, sat down, I heard the cleaning lady come in the restroom and start to clean out the stall next door. Fine. It was less embarrassing than it could have been because all of her mopping and sweeping and toilet-paper-changing provided some nice background noise. I was sure that after she finished the one stall and then realized the other was occupied, she would leave the bathroom and come back later.
BUT NO. To my very, very great horror, she finished cleaning out the stall next to me (it took her about one minute, lest you get any ideas) (too late for this post, I guess), and then, as far as I could tell from my limited audio and visual clues, just stood there. In the bathroom. The tiny, two-occupancy bathroom. Right. outside. my stall. Where I was trying (key word TRYING) to finish my business. It was soooooo uncomfortable and awkward and shameful and quiet, so quiet.
Obviously I wasn't operating under ideal conditions, so I decided to abort. As I finished up, I told myself that maybe my mind was playing tricks on me and that I just hadn't heard her leave. I even allowed myself a smile at how foolish I was for thinking she could be right outside the stall, just standing there and waiting for me to finish. Because seriously, how weird would that be??
And then I opened the door and saw that that's exactly what she was doing. We practically brushed by each other in the small space as I went to wash my hands and she went to clean out the stall.
WHAT THE HECK, people? I ask you. She broke all the rules of bathroom behavior. She broke rules of bathroom behavior that I didn't even know existed. Awful awful awful I will never forget this day.
ALSO.
I usually try to save major (ahem) bathroom trips for home, but this morning at work I just couldn't wait. So I gave in and went to the ladies' bathroom. There are two stalls in there. It's nice that there's more than one so you don't have to just stand there awkwardly and wait (ooh, foreshadowing), but on the other hand, two stalls doesn't allow for a lot of anonymity. There's you, and there's them. This morning, I was lucky (or so I thought) to be the only one in there at the time I entered.
Anyway, right after I went in and, uh, sat down, I heard the cleaning lady come in the restroom and start to clean out the stall next door. Fine. It was less embarrassing than it could have been because all of her mopping and sweeping and toilet-paper-changing provided some nice background noise. I was sure that after she finished the one stall and then realized the other was occupied, she would leave the bathroom and come back later.
BUT NO. To my very, very great horror, she finished cleaning out the stall next to me (it took her about one minute, lest you get any ideas) (too late for this post, I guess), and then, as far as I could tell from my limited audio and visual clues, just stood there. In the bathroom. The tiny, two-occupancy bathroom. Right. outside. my stall. Where I was trying (key word TRYING) to finish my business. It was soooooo uncomfortable and awkward and shameful and quiet, so quiet.
Obviously I wasn't operating under ideal conditions, so I decided to abort. As I finished up, I told myself that maybe my mind was playing tricks on me and that I just hadn't heard her leave. I even allowed myself a smile at how foolish I was for thinking she could be right outside the stall, just standing there and waiting for me to finish. Because seriously, how weird would that be??
And then I opened the door and saw that that's exactly what she was doing. We practically brushed by each other in the small space as I went to wash my hands and she went to clean out the stall.
WHAT THE HECK, people? I ask you. She broke all the rules of bathroom behavior. She broke rules of bathroom behavior that I didn't even know existed. Awful awful awful I will never forget this day.